Healing open wounds
by beginnerwriter16
Summary: Castle has a secret and Beckett and Castle are about to go undercover as a married couple. However, Castle has a secret. Season 3. Rated T for now
1. Chapter 1

**This is set during season 3 sometime, Josh and Gina are not in the picture and so Kate and Rick are not in relationships.**

 **Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

On a Tuesday in Manhattan Richard Castle was walking along the busy street to his favourite coffee shop. As he walked he got occasional glances due to his minor limp but he was used to both the limp and the stares. As a young boy his limp was much more prominent as he adjusted life with one leg. As he aged he adjusted to his prosthetic alot better and it was almost impossible to recognize the slightly different way he walked to others. However, he didn't go around advertising his disability, he was rather private about it with Martha, Alexis Gina and Meredith being the only people who knew. He often questioned telling the people at the 12th but always knew that if he did they would treat him differently and wouldn't allow him to do the same things as he did now.

Once outside the coffee shop he observed the long queue and looked down at his watch. 'It's only a little after 9am' he thought to himself. He quickly joined the queue and pondered what the day held for him. He would go to the precinct, like he always did, he would sit in his chair semi-quiet and then the team had a meeting with the captain at 11am. He frowned as he thought what the meeting may be about. Beckett and him haven't gotten into any life or death situations lately and he hasn't broken anything either. The queue moved forward and so he followed. He continued to get lost in his thoughts as he considered how the impact may impact him. Not even the Captain knew about his missing right limb. Once he reached the beginning of the queue he quickly placed his order, collected it and left for the precinct.

He loved bringing Beckett coffee as he gets to see her smile for him and that thankful, happy glint in her eyes. Everybody who knew Kate could easily say she was a caffeine addict. He sat in his chair and as always when he lowered himself he leaned more towards his left side and let his legs rest straight out for a while before pulling them closer to the chair. As he sat there he thought amusedly how a building full of detectives never figured out about his leg. Rubbing his thigh he thought about whether he would ever tell his friends at the 12th and if he did he wondered under what conditions it may be.

Kate was trying to focus on her current case with the current murder victims being a happily married couple. Not even a day after being back from their holiday they had been murdered in their suburban home. The detectives were starting to reach dead end after dead end as it was becoming obvious that nobody from their day to day lives could have done this as they all had solid alibis and no motive. The only thing now stopping the investigation was the holiday resort they had been at the days before their murder. They were refusing to let any detectives watch any security footage and refusing to let them question the staff. Beckett looked up needing to look somewhere else other than the almost blank murder board. As she was trying to look anywhere but at the murder board her gaze landed on Castle and she smiled. He was wearing a blue button down which only intensified the colour of his eyes with black slacks. She smiled slightly as she thought how dashing he looked as he concentrated on the murderboard, his eyebrows furrowing slightly with his eyes moving slightly side to side as he read over and over again the information the board provided. Even though he wasn't a cop he did make a good detective. Beckett was always grateful that her favourite author wasn't actually a cop as she felt that it kept him safe from most danger, except the times he didn't listen to her when she told him to stay in the car.

He looked over to her to see what she might be thinking and caught her staring at him and their eyes locked. Startling blue met intense green and they shared a moment. The longer their eyes locked the more intense it became and the precinct started to disappear. A loud squeak from a chair broke their gaze and they both looked away as a blush rose to Becketts cheeks. He smiled. They've been getting closer, bolder over the last few weeks with their stares becoming more intimate and their fingers started to drift over each other whether its their fingers, arms or the small of their backs. He loved the new direction their more than friends but not quite boyfriend/girlfriend relationship has been heading and it gave them both butterflies.

Before anybody knew it it was 11am and the Captain was calling for the team to go into the office.

"As you guys know the holiday resort is being less the cooperative so me and the higher ups have decided it would be best to do an undercover mission as it has come to my attention that over the last 2 months 4 happily married couples who have come home from the resort have turned up murdered in the suburban homes. We have decided that Beckett and Castle will pretend to be a recently married couple who have decided to spend their honeymoon there. Ryan and Esposito will consult through skype everyday and will do the groundwork, running the leads you gave them. You will report to the resort at 3pm, so you should go home and pack. You guys are dismissed." Roy Montgomery stated, beginning to sit down as Beckett, Ryan and Esposito left his office. Castle hesitated behind the others.

"Is everything okay Castle?" Montgomery looked up.

"It's just that uh-" Castle stumbled over his words not entirely sure how to phrase what he was trying to say.

"Spit it out Castle"

"I may have a certain medical condition that may or may not affect me on a daily basis and I'm worried th-" Castle was cut off by Montgomery as he looked up from his paperwork.

"And what medical condition would this be that you failed to inform me about for the past three years?"

Castle winced "A prosthetic leg"

Montgomery let out a deep breath and considered his words "I don't have a reason to believe that for this undercover mission that your leg should be a problem but after this case I'm going to want a meeting with you to discuss this further." Roy said sternly and then indicated for Castle to leave. He quickly nodded and left and for the first time since Roy Montgomery has known Richard Castle he noticed his subtle limp.

Rick felt a strange feeling at someone knowing about his leg and he could feel Roy's stare on his leg as he left. Deep down he knew he was going to have to tell Kate but he just didn't know how. How do you tell the woman you've been in love with for the past three years that you've basically been lying to her and your not the man that she thought you were? What if she is disgusted by the amputation site? What if she doesn't like the idea of dating someone with disability? He knew he should probably tell her as it might be a shock to her waking up next to a man who she thought had two legs only to find one of them missing. He almost wanted to laugh at the scene he imagined but deep down he knew that wouldn't be the way she should find out, she deserved better than that.

He looked at her desk and saw her packing her stuff away so he decided to quickly give her a brief warning at least. He went over to her and lightly tugged on her long purple sleeve. She looked up at him with soft curious eyes.

"Kate can I speak to you quickly?" He asked softly to keep from anybody hearing their conversation. He lead her to the breakroom and leaned against the counter.

"What's up Castle?"

"Kate when we get to the resort your going to see some stuff in my luggage that might raise some questions for you" He started to explain and her eyebrows began to furrow in confusion. "I don't want you to be worried and I don't want you to start asking questions as soon as you see it but I promise you that I will tell you when we get there because honestly, right now, I'm not quite ready nor prepared." And with that he left leaving behind a very confused detective and a writer with a pounding heart.


	2. Chapter 2

**Disclaimer : Castle is not mine.**

Castle walked into the loft shortly after 12pm and went straight to his bedroom and sat on the edge of his bed. He stared down at his leg, his hand rubbing his thigh. Despite having a prosthetic for so long he still got pain every now and then or his prosthetic would pinch and rub at whatever is left of his leg. Most days he tried not to think about his leg, wouldn't let himself wallow in pity or grief for his leg. Always being told that he should be happy that he would alive even if he was missing a limb. He was confident in most things in his life but when it came to his leg that is what terrifies him the most. The fear of rejection or pity from people. Page 6 always portrayed him as the playboy author when in fact he was the complete opposite, the truth being that he has only ever been with 2 women; Meredith and Gina. He sighed again and decided it was probably time to start packing. He saw his duffle bag and the very bottom of his wardrobe and inwardly groaned. Things on the floor were the hardest to reach due to the awkward angle he has to bend down at. Resting his right hand on a chest of draws for leverage, he spread his right leg straight behind him and bent with his left knee and quickly snagged the duffle with his left hand before returning to full height. He packed what he usually would, clothes, cologne, toothbrush etc. Then it came time to pack stuff he would need for his prosthetics, the cloth he always saw as a sock to cover what's left of his leg so that the prosthetic does not rub, pain medicine because he still had bad days. He quickly zipped his bag and layed some crutches on the bed next to it. He didn't wear his prosthetic in his sleep and he liked to not wear it so much in the evenings so he often relied on his crutches to get around.

Across town Kate Beckett was pacing in her bedroom, her thoughts running a mile a minute. She wondered what Castle was being so mysterious about, she thought she knew him better than she knew herself. They had been getting closer recently. She smiled as she thought back to the week before when they saw forbidden planet. She knew he had seen the film before, she knew as she saw the look of familiarity in his eyes. She remembered wondering why he has lied, saying he never saw it, but deep down she knew why. She knew it was because he was scared he would get rejected after all she has spent the last 3 years pushing him away. It broke her heart realizing this but it also made her heart flutter as he just wanted to spend time with her. Watching a movie with him was fun but the long week and lack of sleep caught up with her and the next thing she knew he was gently rubbing her cheek with his thumb and softly whispering her name. She felt like she had gotten a glimpse of her future when she had woken up with her head on his shoulder and him gently whispering her name. She was slowly starting to allow herself to have a relationship with him. She was doing it step by step. Allowing the stares to last longer, the touches to become lingering, and for them to go to more places together outside of work. More non-dates that were starting to feel like dates.

She shook herself out of her thoughts. She had to focus, her and Castle were going undercover at a holiday resort, more specifically a holiday resort strictly for married couples. She frowned at her wardrobe as she realized how professional her wardrobe had become over the years with her rarely going on any form of a break and if it was it was usually to her dad's cabin. She picked up a pair of tight, black skinny jeans and laid them on her bed. The jeans fit her just right, hugging her legs making them look long and muscled, the shaped her butt as well thinking back to the other day when she caught Castle checking her out whilst she was bending over writing something on the murder board. She blushed as she started to realize how she generally wore more clothes that she saw Castle appreciated or accentuated her curves. She then got another pair of skinny jeans, these being years old and her favourite. She only ever wore these ones on her days off. They were levis and the denim had worn giving them the perfect 90s vibe which she loved. She decided to throw in a pair of black slacks just in case she thought. Next she moved on to the top half of her body. Once again she sighed at her selection and decided that as soon as this undercover mission was finished she was in desperate need of a shopping trip. She threw in mostly plain coloured tops, black, white, purple and green. She decided she was going to throw in a blue button down which she knew complemented his eyes wonderfully. Next she packed her pajamas, a pair of plaid shorts that flowed and looked a lot shorter on her due to her long legs. She smiled as she imagined Castle's reaction to seeing her in shorts that stopped mere centimeters before her butt. She threw in a pair of long pajama bottoms and a few oversized shirts. She blushed as she thought of what underwear to bring and then rolled her eyes at herself with how ridiculous she was being. She packed a few basic pairs of underwear and deciding to be bold she packed a few pairs of her nicer matching underwear including lace and silk. Next was a swimsuit as she knew the resort had a pool and a man made beach both inside and out. A one piece and a bikini appeared in her suitcase next. She paused to think if she had forgotten anything and deciding she hadn't, making sure she had packed jumpers and socks, she zipped up her suitcase and took a deep breath and sat down on her bed.

Kate quickly stood up, grabbed her suitcase and walked towards the door. She decided that if she sat there any longer she was going to over think the whole situation and she was just going to overwhelm herself. She called a taxi and within 10 minutes she was on her way to Castles. She sent him a quick text once she was in the taxi so that she knew she was on her way to his.

By 2 o'clock Beckett was knocking on Castles door which was quickly opened by a very tired looking Castle.

"Hey Beckett, come on in." Castle waved her in as he slowly walked over to the kitchen.

Beckett watched him as he slowly walked over to kitchen counter where there was a glass of water and a bottle of pills were placed. This caused her to frown slightly.

"You okay there Castle?" She asked nodding her head towards the pill bottle, concern clearly in her eyes.

He sighed "Yeah, I'm fine, I just can't decide whether to take them or not."

"How come?" She asked confused.

"Because if I take them they'll make me tired and I won't be able to drive or anything that involves much concentration." He explained, eyeing the pill bottle, torn between what to do.

"Why do you need the pills anyway?"

"My leg hurts"

"Why does your leg hurt?"

"It's part of what has to do with the no questions, I'll explain it more later but I'm not quite ready now." He explained before taking the pills and walking over towards the door. Beckett watched him walk towards the door and focused on his leg, noticing for the first time the slight limp in his walk. She frowned and wondered what could of happened, she decided that for the mean time she would just go with the theory that he either pulled a muscle or twisted something and didn't want to talk about it because he was embarrassed. Because surely he couldn't of had this limp the whole time she has known him, has he?

He walked over to his bag and picked it up and the crutches that were propped against the wall. Kate became even more confused and opened her mouth to ask a question but he quickly interrupted, "Please, Kate, no questions just yet." He almost begged and she quickly closed her mouth and went to leave the loft with him. Outside the door he handed her his keys to both the loft and the car and asked her to lock the door for him due to how much he was carrying. She quickly locked the door for him and they rode down in the elevator in silence with Castle leaning heavily on the wall of the elevator, already becoming sleepy from the pain medicine. Kate slightly reached out and lightly stroked her hand over his arm, this made him look at her and she smiled in return.

She realised at this moment in time that he needed her to be accepting of his needs and to be comforting and she is trying to do that.

The elevator doors opened and the walked over to Castles Land Rover. She loved his car but she wouldn't tell him that. The chance to drive it made her excited and she couldn't help but speed up towards the drivers side and was bouncing slightly when she realised Castle was bent over close to the elevator. Beckett quickly put her bags in the car and quickly walked over to him. He was panting heavily and his eyes were squeezed tight in pain.

"What's wrong Caste? How can I help?" She asked him, rubbing her hand up and down his back.

"Can you carry my bags please and I'll just use the crutches to help." She took his bags off of his shoulder and stayed close whilst he put his crutches in place. "Thank you." He whispered as he slowly started to walk towards the car. Once at the car he threw the crutched in the back seat and used his left leg to take most of his weight whilst he got in the car, Beckett by his side in case he needed her. Once he was in the car she closed the door and put his bags on the back seat along with her bags and she quickly got in the car and started driving. The tension in the car was evident and was becoming slightly awkward.

He sighed heavily whilst she was driving, his head rested against the cool glass window. His voice was pained and gravely when he spoke.

"When I was younger there was an accident and you could say I've got a lot of nerve damage in my leg. That's why it hurt so much today, the pain comes and goes, always has done and always will. For now that is all I'm able to share in my current state."

Kate let out a slow breath before reaching over and grasping his hand in hers "Thank you, Rick" They held eye contact for only a second as she was driving, but she never let go of his hand.


	3. Chapter 3

**So sorry how long it took me to update this story. I'm trying to work on the quality of my storys so it is taking me much longer to update this one.**

 **Disclaimer : Castle is not mine.**

Castle was asleep for the rest of the journey to the holiday resort. She spent a majority of the journey wondering about Castle, about the man she thought she knew so well and now just finding out that she clearly didn't know him as well as she thought. Then she thought about all the times Castle just gave her space and time because he knew her so well and he had faith in her that she would tell him when she was ready. That is what she was going to do for him she decided and they neared closer and closer to the resort.

Once at the resort, Beckett gently woke Castle. Whilst softly shaking his shoulder she whispered his name until his eyes eventually fluttered open, still hazy with sleep. He was confused at first until he remembered what they were doing. As reality started to wake him up he began to get nervous at what he was about to do within mere hours. He had never told someone who was so important to him about his leg.

He was trying to convince himself that she wouldn't stop him from shadowing her, after all he managed to keep this a secret for the better half of three years. Three years of running, jumping and saving her life. The last one he smiled at.

He took a deep breath before he got out of the car.

 _Everything is going to be okay._

The resort would put the word mansion to shame with its size and as Castle and Beckett began to get out of the car it was becoming obvious that this resort was aimed at the wealthy. Just as they stepped out of the car a young man rushed towards them in khaki shorts and a white polo. He was eager, Castle thought, probably new to the working world.

"Leave your bags and Car with me whilst you guys go check in." He said in one breath as he rushed around.

Beckett smirked at Castle as they watched the young man ungracefully unload the bags along with the crutched. Dropping one on the floor. Castle winced at the clatter as it collided with the floor.

As they got to the front desk a tall blonde woman named Kelsie welcomed them and gave them a form to fill in, a health form. Over the years Castle had filled out many of these, always the same. Check this box for any disabilities, he rolled his eyes and checked the box. He saw Beckett trying to get a glimpse at his form and smirked, always the curious one. However, he began to wish he had just filled it out at the desk when he remembered and saw the next question, 'please specify disability and needs'. He never liked specifies, he knew once he did people always looked at his leg as he walked away and the limp he tried so hard to hide throughout his life became apparent. He sighed as he got up to walk to the desk and hand the form in. Once at the desk he quickly filled in the needed details away from Beckett's curious gaze. He felt Kelsie's stare on his leg as he walked away. Instead of focusing on his leg he looked at Beckett and her kind smile. He slowly sat down next to her and extended his right leg as he leaned in towards her, slowly invading her personal space and catching the slight smell of cherries and something uniquely Beckett. She turned around to face him as the corners of her mouth lifted slightly indicating her feeling towards his invasion of her space. Her hazel eyes with golden flakes shining as they connected with his sea blue eyes.

"You trying to look at my information there husband?" She asked with amusement swimming in her expression.

"Nothing I shouldn't already know, honey" He played her game, because for now they were allowed to be openly flirt with each other. He was sneaking a look at her sheet and saw she had written under the allergy section. "What are you allergic to?" He asked as he furrowed his brow.

"Hay, Cats and shellfish. Nothing too major but definitely not a pleasant experience." She told him.

"How come I didn't know this." Castle was confused, he thought he knew almost everything about his muse and an allergy wasn't anything small either.

"Well, honey," She was playing along with pet names as well Castle realised with delight "we don't go for too many shellfish dinners in barns with cats as servers." She smirked at him, quirking her eyebrow. Castle found;to contain it, he snorted as her laughed at her explanation.

"Well sweetheart I didn't know you were into those kinds of restaurants and I must say I am absolutely delighted at that explanation." He smiled, happiness shining out of every pore.

Kate stood up to hand in her form and as she did so Kelsie was giving her sympathetic eyes at this she became confused and as she turned she rolled her eyes at the blonde. Once sat next to Castle she decided to go along with the openly flirting that this case required and rested her head on Castle's shoulder and grabbed his hand, interlacing their fingers. She felt his startle for a second at the unfamiliar touch but soon enough he was melting into her warmth as much as she was and rested his head upon hers.

Heaven.

This was the only word she could think to describe this moment.

However, the moment was broken when Kelsie walked over and announced that their room was ready for them. She lead them down multiple hallways the walls white with pictures hanging on them of landmarks and places around the world. Going up a flight of stairs that lead them eventually to the third floor. She stopped at the door labeled ' _Honeymoon penthouse 02'_. Opening the door Beckett and Castle were surprised at the luxury of the room. All along the wall was windows that granted them the view of the sea and beach. It was breathtaking.

"I'll leave you guys to get settled, there's a pamphlet with times and everything on and all the information you'll need. You guys must be bursting to get some alone time, I'm surprised you guys are keeping your hands to yourselves most couples struggle." She smirked as both Castle and Beckett blushed and quickly left the bedroom.

They couldn't look each other in the eyes and so wondered around the room before they both stumbled upon and king size bed covered in rose petals.

"Oh" slipped out of Beckett's mouth before she turned to Castle eyes wide. He stared into her shocked eyes as the realisation hit that they would be sharing a bed and as he fell deeper into her stare that's when he saw it, a little bit of eagerness but more than anything.

Love.

At that he lost his breath.


	4. Chapter 4

**Disclaimer : Castle is not mine**

Castle took a moment to look around the bedroom that Beckett and himself would be sharing, it was breathtaking. The windows gave a direct look out onto the beach and he imagined Beckett, stood out at the window the stars shining bright above, her delicate frame hidden by a white flowing dress and her love, curly hair tied back to cascade down her bare back. The definition of beauty. He was aware that he would have to tell her soon, she deserved to know, after all that he has asked from her in the past this was one of the few things he could give her. He was just so terrified, he knew she wasn't like so many others before, the women he almost told, all the what ifs. She was his always, the one person he could see growing old with, growing a family and going on so many adventures. They were an adventure. He knew she would only worry once she found out, the second glance before they go to a take down, the glance at his leg in any dangerous situation, the overwhelming urge to just protect. He knows this because this is how he feels when its her. He has the overwhelming urge to protect her, but to also love her.

He glanced up and saw her standing there admiring the view, her frame outlined by the beaming sun and his breath hitched. _Now or never_ he thought to himself and decided to dive straight in, head first, no turning back. He slowly and quietly walked up to her, he didn't want to startle her, he wanted her to stay calm and in the moment. As he got closer he could sense that she knew he was there and he gentle wrapped his arms around her waist and she gently rested her arms atop him. A loving embrace. He rested his head on her shoulder, gently nudging his chin into the crook of her neck, fitting like a puzzle piece.

"What are you doing Rick?" She asked almost breathlessly, her head turning slightly to face him but not so much as to disturb the gentle atmosphere that he so deliberately created.

"I'm telling you the answers to all the questions I know you must have." He said back just as gently, softly whispering the words into her skin and watching absorb in the reflection of the glass. He saw her mover her eyes forward to connect with his in the glass and she gave the slightest nod of understanding, a queue to continue. He let out a deep sigh that ran down her neck to her spin, causing her to inhale deeply. "When I was a young boy I was in a car accident and I managed to get out with not much injury, however there was a deep cut on my leg, so deep that they had to put me under anesthesia and when I woke up it was gone." He heard her sharp gasp and her head tried to turn to face him but he didn't move, restricting her movement in the process. "I don't remember too much, apparently there was an infection, Necrotising fasciitis, or as you might know it, flesh eating bacteria." He saw her eyes saddened. "I found out a few years after that the surgeon who performed the amputation was a hack, wasn't very good at his job and also an ex lover of mothers, or otherwise known as dad." He saw the surprise then, the furrow of her brows, the widening of her eyes. "The Necrotising fasciitis infection was fairly small and located on my foot, and was caught early enough as to probably just need deep tissue removal, but good old dad never wanted a son, never wanted me to be born even and was drunk enough to make sure the child he never wanted suffered for the rest of his life. Above the knee amputation with a far from clean amputation site with nerve damage."

"Castle" She breathed out, he could see the tears in her eyes.

"When mother found out she was more than angry, she was murderous and she was devastated, because this man who had nothing to do with me beside DNA altered my life forever. We filed a law suit and he was found dead 2 months later, appeared to be suicide." He took a deep breath "I didn't tell you because I didn't want you to treat me different, I'm fully capable of doing most things and I promise Kate it wasn't anything personal, I can count on one hand how many people I've told. But you, you meant the most."

She was still, absorbing the moment and all the information that came with it and suddenly it was all so clear, the subtle limp, the way he favours his left side and when he sits he stretches out his right leg. He takes off from his left foot and so many more things were suddenly making perfect sense. She turned in his arms and her eyes connected with his for a second before her arms came around his waist in a fierce hug, her head buried in his neck as she breathed him in. It was okay because this was her Castle and this was something that had always been there so it wouldn't change things now.

"Kate say something please." He begged and she heard the vulnerability in his voice.

"Cast-Rick, this doesn't change anything, you are still the goofy man I have known for the past 3 and a half years, you are still you. Will it take some getting used to and plenty of questions of course, but this doesn't change anything." She reassured him quickly. She pulled back and looked him in the eyes, truly showing her feelings through their intense eye connection. Once she saw that he accepted and believed what she told him she leant up and slowly kissed his cheek. "Now if you will excuse me I am desperate for a pee" and with that she was running towards the toilet and he was left smiling behind her.

He walked over to the bed and sat down stretching out his leg. It was hurting today, and he wanted nothing more than to take off his prosthetic and have a nap. But he was scared that it might be too surreal for her but she said she was okay with it. At that moment the bathroom door opened and she stepped out and looked at him caught in an obvious struggle. "You alright there Rick?"

He looked up, startled, "I want to take a nap" She raised her eyebrows in question "I don't like sleeping with my prosthetic on" again she raised her eyebrows "and I didn't pack any pajama bottoms because for some reason I didn't think we would be sharing a bed and you'll see it."

"Does it bother you that I'll see it?" He shook his head "Then take a nap Rick and if it's okay with you I'd like to have a nap to." He smiled and nodded. She was trying to be reassuring for him and he was appreciating it as deep down he was self conscious and this was one of the few aspects of his life in which he wasn't confident.

He watched out of the corner of his eye and she performed a ninja move with a sleep shirt and bra which meant he couldn't see a thing and she removed her jeans so she would be comfortable to sleep. He looked at her long tanned legs and he continued to stare at them until she cleared her throat and smirked at him. He undone the top of his jeans as he felt her start to settle into the bed. He felt her eyes on his back and he stood up to remove his jeans past his hips and sat back down again so that he could remove them a leg at a time. When it came to his prosthetic he felt the bed shift a little and he looked back to see her kneeling slightly and staring obviously at his leg, he looked at her and she blushed and shrugged "sorry I am curious" he chuckled lightly and patted the section of bed beside him so that she could see more clearly. Once she was comfortable beside him he continued. He removed the jeans carefully over his prosthetic and put them on the floor. He unclipped the prosthetic leg and removed it, leaving the little bit of the leg that was left with a fabric sock over it. He looked at her and she placed her hand on his bare legs, electric shocks going through the both of them at the contact. "It doesn't change anything" she whispered reassuringly. He nodded and removed the last bit and revealed the amputation site, the uneven lines and surface. She could tell he was feeling self conscious and looked at him and smiled, squeezing his leg. "Still the same old goofy Rick." Kate kissed his cheek and then went back to her position on the bed, setting an alarm for 2 hours time whilst he got in the bed beside her.

"Hey Castle?"

"Yeah?" He asked turning his head to look at her.

"Can I ask a question"

"Of course"

"How does sex work?"

And with that he blushed bright red and choked on air, shocked that she asked such a question but greeatful as it broke the heavy tension in the room. He turned his head and saw her smirking at him.

 _Yeah, nothing has changed, he_ thought.


	5. Chapter 5

**A/N: Over the summer I'm deciding to try and finish at least 3 of my stories, one of them being this one. Is there any of my stories you guys want to see me finish or should I try something brand new?**

 **Disclaimer : Castle is not** **mine.**

There was an insistent buzzing that stirred him from his deep slumber, however there was a war within him. There was a heavy and warm weight on him as he battled between wakefulness and dreams. The insistent buzzing continued and only felt as it was getting louder. He slowly cracked his eyes open and was at first confused to see a head full of brown hair on his chest, and his heart stopped as reality came rushing back. The undercover mission, telling her about his leg and now they're cuddling. Emotions were warring within him, the relief of finally telling her and the vulnerability he felt deep down inside. He felt a new hope for the potential start of a new relationship with her, now that there were no secrets and she handled it so well, a lot better than both Gina and Meredith. Gina had caught him off guard one day when she had welcomed herself into her home and saw him in his boxers with his prosthetics off and balancing delicately on his crutches. He remembers it clearly, the world had stopped spinning and then she was screaming, he was startled and fell over, Alexis had come running in and that was one of the few times he had ever seen Alexis be rude to someone as she demanded what she was doing in their home and as Gina was still shocked had then demanded she left their home before she called the police. He smirked, he darling daughter once threatened to call the police on Gina. The buzzing once again disrupted his train of thought and without thinking he slammed his hand down on the buzzing machine and with a loud crack it stopped. With the loud cracking noise Kate was suddenly no longer on Castles chest but was suddenly sat up, wild eyes scanning the room with her chest raising as if she was out of bed. When her eyes met his he gave her a sheepish smile as she rolled her eyes and rested her head in her hands.

"Castle what the hell are you doing" She said annoyed that she had been startled awake out of a blissful sleep.

"Sorry the alarm was going off and it was annoying" She glared at him for a second before she rolled her eyes and the corner of her lips quirked slightly, he was a complete dork sometimes.

She turned to get out of bed to get up and ready for the day and the case they should be working on. She turned to look at him when she heard him sit up as well but he looks like he is looking for something.

"You alright there Partner?"

"Um yeah but could you please pass me my crutches they're on the other side of the room" He tried not to make eye contact as he visibly looked uncomfortable at having to ask for help. Beckett got up and passed them to him with a kind smile and continued to stretch and pick out her clothes for the day.

Carefully he placed his hands in the crutches and balanced and was able to go into the bathroom where he planned on having a shower. He walked over the bathroom and shut and locked the door behind him. He then leaned on the counter to take a few minutes to himself and to adjust to the openness he was now feeling. He had no secrets between Beckett and himself and now that he has asked for help, albeit for something small, he was just finding it difficult. He didn't want to be seen as weak or unable to do simple things for himself. He wanted to be the stereotypical strong male for her, as when he looks back on it, he has never seen her pursue a relationship with anyone other than a strong male, such as Soronson and Schlemming. He worried that this would affect his chance at a serious relationship with her. She already burdened herself with so much like her mothers murder, her fathers sobriety, her own mourning and every murder she solved and the vicims and their families. He didn't want her to feel further burdened by his disability, he hated that word, he could do almost everything himself and needed help very little. He sighed and walked over to the shower and shook his head again, he wouldn't be able to shower in here, no handrail, no adhesives on the floor and certainly no chair for him to sit in, without these adjustments it just wasn't a possibility with his balance being bad whilst on a dry surface let alone a small one. He would have to have a bath tonight and try and figure out how to get in and out without the help of Kate. He was able to have baths at the loft without help as everything in his loft was adjusted so that he wouldn't need help and he could feel independent and like the strong man he always knew he was meant to be if he had had two fully functioning legs. He sighed and he just felt like punching a wall, she wasn't meant to find out like this and she most certainly wasn't meant to be helping him with stuff already. He turned to the door and opened it more forceful than he should have and with the help of his crutches walked back into the bedroom to sit on the edge of their bed to put his prosthetic on, he hated not showering after hes been asleep.

Beckett turned to look at him and saw the worried look on his brow and the way he was frowning and just slightly shaking his head. "Are you okay Rick?" She asked him softly as she walked over to him and sat on the bed next to him.

"It's just hard." He said quietly "I haven't told many people about my leg and I hate that im already asking you for help with things because I'm so used to being independent," She went to interrupt him but he continued on "and this place isn't accomodated to my disability" he shook his head with a disgusted look on his face at the word "and I just want to have a shower but I can't because there is nothing for me to hold onto or to sit in because I cannot have a shower without either of those things cause I will fall and I will hurt myself and I have done that before I broke my ankle because of that before. But there is a bathtub but I will struggle to get myself in and out of the bathtub and it will take awhile and hell there is a chance that I won't be able to get in and out and all I wanted was a shower to feel clean and like myself." He turned sad eyes towards her and she smiled at him. He saw her slowly lifted her hand and stroke the side of his face and slightly push his head onto her shoulder so she could rest her head on his.

"Rick I love that you told me and I know you are independent, hell you didn't hide it for this long if you weren't independent. But I love being able to help you and I love that you trusted enough to tell me and as much as it scares me I feel like there is more intimacy between us, in the sense that there is more openness and maybe even more of those moments that I've denied for so long. Rick I will do anything for you, even things as simple to getting you your crutches to things much more personal to helping you in the shower and getting in and out of the bathtub. And I'm scared of my feelings for you but I do care for you and it's easier to say all of this because I don't have to look into your deep blue eyes and I just want you to know that I have feelings for you and even though I am not ready for a relationship yet I want you to know that I am almost there, I am almost ready for that with you."

The air around them was tense, there was so many things within the silence, feelings and lost words. Things they wanted to say and yet they knew that now wasn't the time, this silence was so precious and so delicate. It was tense and yet comfortable. It was a contradiction and neither of them knew what to say. And yet it was perfect.

"I have feelings for you to." He whispered and he turned his head slightly, he could smell her and she smelled devine, he could feel himself almost drooling, he took another deep breath and he knew she was the person he wanted to spend his life with. He turned his head slightly more and he could see the pale line of flesh and her pulse jumping underneath her skin, he could feel her breath come just slightly quicker and slightly heavier, he could feel her skin brushing along the side of his face as he slowly lifted his face. He saw a small freckle of her skin and smiled slightly, he would find every freckle on her skin for the rest of his life. He lifted his head further and came eye to ear. She had adorable ears, they were a little small and her cartilage stuck out a bit but it was adorable. Then suddenly they were eye to eye as she turned her head and her hair whipped across his face as she exhaled and he got even more of her divine smell and he felt the breath leave his body as her eyes stared into his soul and then flickered to his lips.

"I'm going to kiss you now, Kate" He whispered in one breath, his hand lifting to tuck her hair behind her ear and then to hold onto her neck as he slightly leaned forward deep blue meeting forest green. The were only millimeters apart, her breath mingling with his and he was finding it hard to breath, she was just magnificent and he thinks he might explode as soon as their lips touch. Her tongue flicks out to moisten her lips and then her eyes go down to his lips again. And then there was bliss and perfection as their lips met in a soft kiss and her lips were still wet and there was electricity flying out of every pore in his body and he felt her gasp. He moved his lips and he felt his blood begin to run south and her hands clasp onto his biceps. He pulled away and looked at her, as he realised her eyes were closed but she was smiling, he allowed himself to smile.

"Wow" she said in a breathy whisper. Wow indeed he thought and it was possibly the best kiss in his life. Short and sweet. She pulled away slightly and looked into his eyes. "Not that that wasn't amazing, but I think you should get ready so that we can go and solve a murder and then hopefully do more that" She said as she bought a hand to her still tingling lips.

"Oh yeah, we are definitely doing more of that." He said whilst his eyes were shining. He quickly got ready for the day and even saw her sneak a glance at him whenever he had to reach or bend to get something and each time he caught her she would turn away blushing. Once he was ready he grabbed her hand and practically pulled her out of the room. "Lets go solve a case so we can make out some more." He said with a cheeky smirk.

She smirked back at him and rolled her eyes "I would hardly call that making out Castle."

"Then what would you call it?"

"A gentle kiss, but if you want I could show you what making out is" She gave him a smirk and raised an eyebrow at him before giving him a hard kiss on the mouth before walking off, leaving him in disbelief behind her.

 **A/N: once this story gets to 60 reviews I will post the next chapter! Reviews make me write faster!**


	6. Chapter 6

**A/N: This fic isn't based around a case and so there will be little to no information around it.**

 **Disclaimer : Castle is not mine.**

It didn't take long for Castle and Beckett to get the information they needed and to catch the killer, after all it was the retreat that was in the way of them finalising their case. After making an official arrest both Beckett and Castle went back to their room to change and pack up what little they had unpacked. The killer, a jealous middle aged man who had never found love himself, had resisted arrest and had sprinted across the field until he was stopped back Castle tackling him to the ground. The instant Castle's body hit the ground Beckett got a surge of worry runs through her. This was quickly dissipated once she saw him roll over and get back up to his feet albeit he had mud and grass smeared all over him. The moment he looked up and their eyes made contact, they both felt the moment everything would change, as once they got back to their room they knew they would have to speak and the possibility of a us was then a definite. It stole his breath, the way a strand of her hair covered her face, her chest heaving from the chase. Her eyes sparkled, whether with the rush of catching a killer or the recognition that they were no longer Detective Beckett and Castle but no they were about to be Kate and Rick. The air was electric with the knowledge of change.

They managed to walk rather calmly back to their room with both their arms dangling at their sides, their hands brushing with each step. Neither took the other hand, the temptation was there but there was also the unspoken agreement that they would wait until they were into the room before either would speak of the events that hand unfolded just hours ago. It was still new and fragile but Kate couldn't help but think otherwise, they had always had the indescribable bond even from the beginning, they both just new each other and they connected mentally like she had never done with another man, nor a friend. If she was being sappy she would even dared to say that they were meant for each other, soul mates, destined to be. She rolled her eyes at herself but couldn't help the smirk that overtook her face at her ridiculousness, Castle had a way of making her believe in such things without trying, making her believe in true love and other such things she never debated before she had met Castle. But how could a kiss like before feel so good, so right if they weren't meant to be together, if the weren't eachothers missing pieces. Castle saw her smiling to herself and his heart missed a beat, she had that effect on him at the most simplest of actions, even the unconscious ones. He wondered what she was thinking that has her smiling to himself, a small part of him dared to think it was a small smile of love, he questioned if he was tricking himself into thinking such things as he was hoping that she would love him as much as he loves her. He knows they're soul mates and that they were meant to be and he has a small feeling that she might be thinking the same thing.

They both stopped outside their room door, neither bothering to move as both of their breathing sped up. Everything was becoming so real and so exciting, he was a buzzing ball of excitement and he has a feeling that she can feel it, hell he thinks that the people in the reception can feel it. He waited for this moment for 3 years, to be in this situation with her, where they both have the knowledge of each other's feelings for the other and they are openly acknowledging them and acting on them with caution. He made the first move to open their door on the realization that he held the key, he saw her startle just slightly out of the corner of his eye and the corner of his mouth tilted up slightly, she must have been lost in her own mind as well and he hoped equally as excited and buzzing as he was. Once the door was open he gestured for her to go first and she startled forward in what felt like sudden movements within the sudden atmosphere. She walked to the centre of the room and stopped to turn to him, watching him close the door and place his belongings on the table located near the door. The moment he turned around she felt as if the air had been sucked out of both her lungs and the room, their chemistry the only things present and it made every nerve within her stand up on edge, ready to feel to what extent their feelings can set her alight.

"We should talk" His husky whisper broke the tension.

"We should" She took a step forward, bringing herself closer to him.

"We kissed" he replied taking a step towards her.

"We did" She took another step towards him and she suddenly felt brave. She saw his adams apple bounce and all she could think is what it must feel like to feel that motion around her lips. She took another step forward "and it was electric" another step "and breathtaking" they were toe to toe now "and I would very much like to do it again." Then suddenly their lips crashed together, her hands scraping through the hair at the nape of his neck pulling him closer because even though there was only millimeters of space it was still too much space, and all she could think was how she wanted no space between them. She pushed him slightly back until he was slammed against the door and yes this is what she meant by no space. It wasn't until oxygen became an annoying reminded that she drew back to taste the skin on his throat, his hands on her hips bruising.

"Wow" He said, his voice gravel against the shell of her ear and it made her shiver. "Not that the kissing isn't amazing because I think you're aware just how amazing I think t is, but we should talk about what this means because I don't want to mess this up. Because I have really strong feelings for you Kate and I don't think your ready to hear the words that I want to say, but I want this Kate, I want an us with you, I want to be with you always. Not just the sexual stuff but everything, when you've had a hard day at work and on those tough days or when your just relaxing on your sofa with a good book. I just want-" He was stopped by a hard press of her lips on his as she stopped his rambling, he heart expanding for the love she has for him.

"Yes, Castle, yes I want that to, I want it all with you." He smiled as their breaths combined. "I need you to know though that it isn't going to be easy, I'm difficult and I'm stubborn," He scoffed at that one "but I'll keep trying as long as you keep being patient with me, I just need you to be patient with me Rick." She rubbed her nose on his, creating a moment of intimacy between them. She was terrified but also excited by the adventure she knew her and Rick were about to have. She drew back to look into his eyes and saw he was still covered in dirt from the take down. "You're filthy" She said with a smirk.

"Why thank you Kate you really know how to charm a guy" Castle replied, his eyes gleaming.

"You need a shower" She commented thinking as to how she would be able to help him.

"Uh, I can't remember" he said with nothing but kindness in his voice. "I can't balance in there without the risk of injury and that's not a risk I'm willing to take" His words were soft, as if gently reminding a child.

"I was going to offer to help you Castle" She smiled at him, she looked at him as realization hit that she was planning on having a shower with him and then he was blushing. He was just so adorable. "However, I would really like to take things slow so that we don't rush into anything and ruin what we have. So I was thinking that maybe we could shower in our swimsuits."

"I don't want to ruin what we have either and I will happily take this slow Kate, I will do anything for you." He tucked a piece of her curly hair behind her ear as he stared deeply into her eyes, trying to convey how much he meant what he just said through this connection. "And if you really don't mind helping me in the shower I will be very grateful however, if you think it'll make you uncomfortable then I don't mind just washing down over the sink and waiting until I get home."

"I don't mind Rick, I want to do this, it was my idea after all."

With that said, they both went to their suitcases and got out what they needed, Beckett a bikini and Castle a pair of swimming trunks. Castle stayed into the room to change into his trunks and this time made sure to have a pair of crutches near him. The trucks were light grey and on one leg fell down to almost his knee, on the other it covered it completely. That's why he liked these trunks so much, even though it made it very clear that he only had one leg but it also covered his other completely meaning that nobody could see the scarring. Beckett had gone into the bathroom to change into a black two piece bikini. It was modest and covered quite a bit of her chest which still left quite a bit to the imagination, the straps were thick and rested on her shoulders as it was more of a top instead of a string bikini, the bottoms were also thick as well and also didn't contain any strings. She stood opposite the mirror examining her body. She was aware she had a nice body as plenty of people had told her in the past but she works hard to have this body and she enjoys keeping fit. She wasn't particularly tanned as she is indoors most of the time in her work clothes meaning her skin was still slightly pale. She took a deep breath and decided it was time to walk out there so that she could help him get clean. A chill ran through her at the thought that her and Castle were about to shower together, dressed but over 48 hours ago this would have never been considered a possibility for the near future and now they were doing it. It was crazy how good time alone had gotten them so close together. She swung the door open and slowly walked out to see him sitting on the edge of the bed, crutches beside him and him ready to go. He was muscular, his arms bulging and his abdomen well defined, he was a solid man and she felt a rush of heat pass through her.

He looked up to see her once he heard the door open and his mouth dropped, oxygen abandoning him and his pupils dilated. She was gorgeous with her long legs that went on for days, to her toned stomach which held a naval piercing, oh god she wasn't joking about that. He gulped as his eyes wandered to her chest, it was well covered and it left plenty to the imagination. However, he could see her nipples hardened through the material and on instinct he licked his lips.

"You're going to catch flies Castle." She walked over to him and leaned over to close his mouth for him. His wide eyes staring back at her and she felt a thrill at how attractive he thought she was. He felt his blood beginning to run south. In a sudden movement he reached for his crutches and stood up causing her to stumble back a couple of steps.

She followed behind him as they walked to the shower. Once inside the air changed dramatically, the electricity grew and it became intense. He couldn't help leaning down and stealing her lips with his, her hands landing on his waiste for support as she leaned up on her tiptoes. Kissing her was now his favourite thing to do. He pulled away slowly and whispered into the air between them "I really love doing that"

She giggled at him "I can tell Castle" and with a brief flick downwards he blushed scarlett from head to toe, causing her to laugh softly. She turned to the shower and set it all up, "Is this temperature okay Castle?" She asked him and once he had stuck his hand under the water and nodded his okay they were ready to shower. She walked behind him as he walked into the shower, her close behind and once it was time to make his other crutches on the other side of the shower wall he relied on her heavily to keep him standing. He had his hands low on her waist and her hugging him to her with her hands landing on his strong back. There wasn't a millimeter of space between them and it was electric, she could feel how much he liked this position and smiled softly as him. Slowly he turned around to face the spray of water as she continued to support and hug him from behind, placing delicate and distracting kisses along his neck, shoulders and back. He showered quickly not wanting to tire her out with his weight but judging by the way she was stroking her hands up and down his abdomen and placing kisses along his body he would say she didn't mind supporting his weight. He turned to tell her he was done.

"Do you mind if I quickly have a shower to whilst were here?" He nodded that he didn't mind. They moved around so that she was plastered to her back whilst she was showering. When she leaned over to pick up the shampoo, her pert butt leaned heavily into Castle's groin causing him to groan, her heart skipped a beat and she felt another wave of heat take over from head to toe. She stood upright as he gripped her waist tighter, his hands wandering over her stomach making her bit her lips to keep quiet. They were trying to take things slow, so she turned around and decided that it was probably best she shower at home, where strong, tall writers weren't in her shower to distract her. "I'm gonna get out now" She whispered, he nodded as his eyes were closed tightly shut.

Once out of the shower it was like everything was on fast forward, they dried dressed, packed and then they were checking out and in the car on the way home with Castle driving this time. As they were driving back home, they were both excited for what the future held for them.

 **A/N : This was the longest chapter of this story yet! Read and review and let me know what you guys think!**


	7. Chapter 7

**Sorry it has taken me so long to update this story I have been so busy with work that I just haven't had the time and I've been trying to make it my longest chapter yet.**

 **Disclaimer: Castle is not mine.**

The car ride was quiet but comfortable, with stolen glances and the brushing of hands. Whenever he could he would hold her hand on the centre console. It was like he was a teenager again with the way she was making him feel. She took his breath every time he saw the love in her eyes, the way she hid her smirk behind her fingers, the way her soft blush tints her cheeks whenever their eyes meet. She made him feel like he was falling in love for the first time, his stomach full of 1000 butterflies because the way his stomach felt couldn't be compared to anything less than a 1000 and that was just when her eyes met his and they locked and he could see the way she felt in her glowing green eyes. The way she makes him feel like he has never felt before, like his heart is going to burst for the amount of love he has for her, the way all he can think about is her, what she might be thinking, what's she doing, what is her favourite memory and what was she like when she was in school and what she wants in the future. He wants to know everything about her. She is consuming every bit of his being and he loves it. She is after all his favourite part of the day. He looked over to her again and their eyes met and he just knew that she was thinking the same, how the way they feel for each other is all consuming and it's not even been 24 hours. He had a feeling that it was always meant to be like this once they admitted their feelings for one another, an all consuming feeling of emotion and want, that once it was released it would continue to crash into him like waves crashing into rocks. Unapologetic and unrelenting. She had her feet on the dashboard and he wanted to tell her how unsafe that was but he knew she wasn't dumb and that she knew the risks. She looked so young and carefree, she had changed into more comfortable clothes for the car ride and he loved it, seeing a whole new side to her that he hasn't seen before. The softer side of her, the side that only a few have been privileged to see. She was in an oversized hoodie, Stanford, it was obvious it had been well loved with a few edges freeing and the material looking soft with the writing cracked from time. Her black leggings looked equally soft, her thick soft socks pulled over her leggings with her shoes kicked off onto the floor. Her whole outfit yelled soft but screamed snuggly.

After an hour of driving, stolen glances and soft touches he was pulling up outside her home. Neither of them knew what to do, their budding relationship still so very new that he didn't know whether he should assume or wait for an invite. He hated not knowing what to do next but he was also loving it as he got to learn more about her. "I don't know what to do" He whispered to her, deciding that he should be honest about how he was feeling because they were not going to get anywhere without communication, they had learned that in the past.

"Well, Rick, I would like very much for you to come up and we can talk some more about what happened over the past day, then we could do some snuggling." She leaned over the centre console to get closer to him, her voice dropping to a whisper, her hair falling over her shoulders and framing her face. "Then we could watch a movie, or maybe not a movie if you catch my drift" she whispered, leaning over further to seal her lips onto his. Once she pulled apart she raised her eyebrow along with a smirk on her lips. Yeah she totally wanted to kiss him some more, kissing hm was addictive.

He coughed and cleared his throat "Um yeah, yes, that sounds great" and just like that they were both getting out of the car and on the way up to her apartment. He couldn't stop fidgeting in the elevator, his toes were moving in his shoes, his fingers fiddling with anything they could reach. He stopped when he felt her gently slide her hand into his much larger one. He looked down at her smiling face, she just had this way of comforting him without having to try, he gave her a gentle smile in return. Although he seemed like a confident guy almost always, Beckett was starting to see the small cracks in his mask, the way he would fidget if he was nervous about something or was thinking, or the way he often avoided peoples eyes when he was dealing with something that he was insecure about. She was happy to be learning all of these small acts that he unconsciously done, she was beginning to learn who Rick was and not just Castle, as they were both similar yet different, he could be a contradiction like that sometimes.

The elevator stopped on her floor and they walked hand in hand to her apartment door. She turned to look at him as she gently unlaced her fingers with his in order to find her keys. She eventually found them buried in a corner of her bag and when she looked up at him with a triumphed smile, the air stilled and everything suddenly felt hotter. Without her heels he towered over her, his blue eyes shining bright with his dilated pupils. The moment their eyes connected they were locked, neither of them able to look away. She felt the light touch of his hands on her hips, his hand spanned her entire hips, his strong and manly hands, his long fingers. His hands truly were divine. It felt like everything was moving in slow motion, her mind spinning as not only 2 minutes ago he was nervous and now he was leaning in and his soft lips were touching hers and ... _mmm_ she loved his kisses, they were all consuming and everything and it felt like they were her life source, the reason she was living and how had they gone all this time without this connection. This connection was everything. Her mind was racing a mile a minute and then she was suddenly being pressed against her door and as she dropped her keys the clank of the metal on the ground was like a switch and suddenly she wasn't thinking anymore, just feeling. Her arms came up to wrap around his neck, pressing her lips firmer against his.

Castle didn't know what happened but suddenly he just felt that he had to kiss her and as soon as his lips touched hers he was drowning in her, his blood rushing south and his body taking control. He pushed her back and it's like a switch was flicked as she started responding to his kiss. He moved his hands down to her back and down until he was gently cupping her buttocks in his hands and squeezed. He felt her moan vibrating through his mouth and vibrate throughout his entire body, she was driving his crazy but he loved every second of it. Driven crazy by Kate Beckett and her delicious lips. He felt her rock forward and he started to hear the screaming in his mind that they need to talk. He withdrew slightly and the rush of cool air between their lips was almost refreshing but not at all what he wanted.

"We need to talk"

His husky whisper broke through the fog in her mind. Her mind was foggy, that had never happened to her before and she felt a thrill at the realization, if there was such a thing in soul mates, he was definitely hers.

"Yeah we should"

She turned around to finally unlock her door and they both finally entered her home. For the first time since knowing Beckett he took his time in looking around her home, noticing all the small things he hadn't before, the things that made it a home. He noticed all of her photos, one of her parents, he saw a photo of a much younger Kate with braces and untameable curls with some elderly people who he assumed to be her grandparents. A photo of her high school graduation with her parents, the braces now gone but the curls still untameable and glasses. He smiled at that, he doesn't think he's ever seen her wear glasses before, or does she wear contacts at the precinct or was it just a minor prescription. He then saw photos of her and the team and the precinct, and a picture of her uniform days. Then he came across a photo of him and Kate, it was at the old haunt after a case and they had gone out, just the two of them for a drink. He remembered in like it was yesterday, it was one of his favourite memories because they were both so care free, she was leaning in to him more and he the same, they weren't Castle and Beckett, that day they were simply Rick and Kate. It made him smile, that a photo of just the two of them made it onto her bookcase. A wide smile over took his face when he saw his completed works on her bookcase, she really was a fan if she had all of his books, and they all seemed well loved by the looks of them. He turned to make a comment but the sight of her stopped him, her hip propped against the kitchen counter watching him look around her home fondness in her eyes.

"Whatcha looking at over there Castle?" She asked, a certain lightness to her tone that he hasn't heard before as she approached him, only stopping when she's directly stood next to him and looking at the photo of them together.

"The photo of us at the haunt" He replied quietly. It felt wrong to even try and speak in a normal volume, everything between them felt so fragile and vulnerable that even raising his voice slightly had the risk of everything falling apart.

"It's one of my favourite photos of us together." She whispered, looking up into his eyes. She didn't look at him long though, knowing that if she continued they would be in that connection for a while and they would never get around to talking to each other about their budding relationship. She cleared her throat and quickly looking away, she turned and headed back to the kitchen "would you like a drink Castle?"

"Water would be great thanks" He said back, knowing that she had cut of the intense connection so that they were able to talk about all the changes between them. He made his way over to the sofa and sat down, making himself comfortable and waiting for her to return. He looked back up when he saw her walk in with two glasses of water, handing him one and placing her on the coffee table, she sat at the other end of the sofa with one leg folded underneath her, she looked so different in her comfortable clothes and in her own home. She looked so young and like she had never experienced the loss of her mother.

"I don't know how to start this conversation" She confessed, resting her head on her hand which she was leaning on the back of the sofa, staring at him thoughtfully.

"I'll start" He said with fake confidence, "I like you Kate, I more than like you in a romantic way but I know you're not ready to hear those words just yet. But as cliche and childish as it sounds, I would like to be able to call you my girlfriend" He gulped, nervous. He couldn't understand why he was so nervous, they had spoken before and he guessed he was just scared that she would change her mind about their whole relationship.

"I agree Rick, I'm not ready to hear those words but I feel the same way. Sometimes I find it hard to breathe around you because you are just so intoxicating, all consuming and the feeling I have for you are so strong that they scare me. I would like to be able to call you my boyfriend" she saw his face lights up at that confession, he goes to say something but she quickly continues on "but I do want to take things slow, as much as I do love kissing you and trust me I love it, I want to take the time to get to know you on a much more personal level, get to know Rick and not just Castle. We will get to all of that other stuff but I want to take it slow, I don't know about you but I think I'm about to experience all my last firsts. Rick I want you to be my last first."

He didn't know what to say to all of this information and instead leaned forward and pulled her into a kiss which he quickly pulled away from not wanting the moment to be side railed by a make out session.

"So it's official we are now a couple?" He asked, wanting reassurance that he didn't just imagine everything that had just happened, didn't just imagine everything that she said to him. When she nodded he released a breath that he didn't know he was holding "Katherine Beckett you just made me so unbelievably happy." His smile felt like it was going to break his face in two. Kate Beckett was his girlfriend, after all this time waiting it felt so surreal. It felt amazing. He held her face in his hand and stroked his thumb along her cheeks and just took his time memorizing every little thing about this moment. "I don't want to forget this moment" he whispered after a couple of minutes of silent observation, both of them staring deeply into each others eyes and noticing for the first time all of the little details of each other's eyes and face. He notices that she had some small freckles spread across her nose and her cheeks, there weren't many meaning that they were covered easily with makeup. She noticed that he had a few small scars on his face that had faded with time.

"Me neither" She whispered.

There was something about this moment that was capturing them both, not able to look away. It felt like this was the moment that started their forever together. It was truly enchanting.

"When do you have to go back to work?"

"The Captain told me to take the rest of the week, because apparently I don't take enough of my holiday time" She whispered. They were both still speaking quietly, both of them were trapped in the bubble that was them, where their love and affection for each other kept them warm.

"We could do something, spend a few days away. I don't want to share you yet, I'm enjoying this bubble we are in"

"I think that would be nice, where did you want to go?"

"We could go to the Hamptons, it's usually pretty quiet this time of year" He suggested, thinking of all the memories they could make with each other on a beach.

"I have an idea, why don't we spend a few days in the Hamptons, and then a few at my dad's cabin and then we come back the day before I go back to work"

He thinks he just fell in love with her a little bit more at suggesting that they spend even more time away together.

"I think you and your plan are absolutely perfect" and just because he couldn't resist he gave her another kiss. Her lips were addicting. With that they separated, Castle waiting on the sofa whilst she quickly packed a few more things and called Jim to ask if it was okay to go to the cabin for a few days, and after some teasing from her dad he gave her the okay. Once they both had the stuff they needed which resulted in a short visit at the Castle loft, they were on their way to the Hamptons.

 **A/N: WOW almost 100 reviews, and only 7 chapters in! Thank you so much for all of the kind feedback. There has only been a few people being rude in the comments but oh well. Read and Review and hopefully the next chapter will be up shortly.**


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